one time i forced my mom to play pokemon for at least half an hour and all she did was catch a butterfree and name it lowfat
- 1: always carry sunglasses
- 2: do your emails while you drink coffee
- 3: disable text preview
- 4: respect all faiths
- 5: eat healthy by yourself
- 6: never wear flip-flops in public
- 7: learn how to say, ''i understand every word you're saying, motherfucker'' in multiple languages.
- 8: take a shower
- 9: it's better to underdress than overdress
- 10: don't worry about manners too much
- ~ Q magazine
I felt like putting a bullet between the eyes of every panda that wouldn’t screw to save its species. I wanted to open the dump valves on oil tankers and smother all those French beaches I’d never see. I wanted to breathe smoke… I felt like destroying something beautiful.
Fight Club (1999) Dir. David Fincher
me: hey American friend i bought this football for you
American friend: *stops playing the banjo and cleaning their guns and drinking their soda* Oh y’all know me too well I love them good ol’ sports hell yeah